Media rules for school children

With media, children can learn, be creative, relax and have fun. It is important for children of primary school age and above to develop a conscious and increasingly independent approach to media. As parents, you are responsible for ensuring that media consumption does not get out of hand. Common rules for media use in the family are helpful.

Introduce fixed media rules

Children of primary school age need clear rules. They provide security and help them to use media consciously. Agree these together with your child:

• Fixed media times: For younger children, fixed times can be set for the use of media. For example, computer game time only after homework or no video time just before bedtime. Perhaps you also have specific family times at home without digital devices.
• Limited duration of use: It is difficult to make a concrete recommendation as to how much time a child of a certain age may spend with media. First, because every child is different and can handle media differently. Secondly, because media is used for very different purposes – for example, for learning, for shared entertainment or for distraction. For younger children, orientation in the form of daily media time is useful. Older children can learn to deal with a weekly quota.
• Place of use: Arrange smartphone-free zones – for example, bedrooms or dining areas.
• Age-appropriate media content: Establish with your child that they may only use age-appropriate content. Use the age ratings as a guide and look out for age-appropriate content that matches your child’s level of development.

Children accept rules better if they are allowed to help decide. Think together about what makes sense – and what happens if a rule is broken. A media usage agreement can help to record everything. Be careful not to use media bans as leverage.

Adapt the media rules to your child’s stage of development. From adolescence, for example, fixed media times can be gradually abolished. Nevertheless, there should be rules about which media may be used for which purposes, for example with their first smartphone. Accompaniment by parents is still important in adolescence. Talk to your child about his or her media use. Ask how and why it uses what and how it copes with it. Always be available if there are any problems.

Rules for computer games

Games are particularly fascinating for many children – but they also pose challenges. Establish clear rules forcomputergames together:

• Play times: Arrange fixed playtimes and keep an eye on your child if they spend too much time playing games.
• Contents: The desire to play games that are actually only intended for older teenagers often leads to tensions in the family. Only use games with an appropriate age rating – and ideally try them out yourself or play them together with your child.
• Play environment: For younger children, the play area should not be the children’s room, but a shared space where you can easily keep an eye on what is being played.

Use technical support

Media time rules are often difficult to enforce – technical aids can help. Parental control functions in operating systems, settings in devices, apps and games as well as parental control apps help to comply with time limits and break times and to filter content. However, your child should gradually learn to put the smartphone or tablet aside by itself after the screen time is over. In this way, they practice and internalize a conscious approach to media.

Younger children should only install new apps and computer games together with their parents. As they get older, you can gradually give your child more responsibility and adjust the technical settings to suit their age.

“But the others are allowed…!”

Sooner or later, many parents hear: “Everyone else already has a smartphone/plays a console/may use TikTok!” Don’t let this put you under pressure. Children compare themselves, but every child is different. Explain your decisions to your child and involve them in an age-appropriate way. Your child will be increasingly influenced by friends at school age. It can help to talk to other parents and agree on common ground rules with classmates or friends.

Being a role model and enjoying media together

As a parent, you are an important guide for your child. Therefore, be aware of your role model function – also with regard to media use. Certain rules should apply to everyone. For example, you can agree that smartphones have no place at mealtimes or set up smartphone-free family days.

Instead of simply regulating media use, it is worth consciously creating shared media experiences. A weekly movie night with the family or listening to music together at the weekend strengthens family cohesion and at the same time offers opportunities to talk about content, discover media preferences and convey values.