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Cyberbullying Help

Your child keeps getting abusive messages in class chat. You hear about false and defamatory representations being spread about your child. Cyberbullying is unfortunately very common. Here we present the information and help offer cyberbullying help.

In brief

  • Online counseling for affected children and adolescents
  • Counseling mainly by experienced young people
  • Free of charge and anonymous
  • Answer usually within 24 hours

Cyberbullying – a brief overview

Being well informed is the first step in being able to act early. For a detailed definition of cyberbullying, see the Cyberbullying Help page and our post. It explains in detail what cyberbullying is, where it takes place, and why people engage in cyberbullying. You will learn how to recognize warning signals and what options you have for taking action.

What does Cybermobbing-Hilfe e.V. offer?

If your child has been a victim of cyberbullying, you should act quickly. Help and advice from experts is the best way.

For this purpose, Cyberbullying-Hilfe offers a counseling service for affected children and adolescents. Here, young people support other young people in a so-called “peer-to-peer” offer. This is often more comfortable for many young people than having to turn to adults. In addition, the offer is completely anonymous

The platform Cybermobbing-Hilfe e.V. was founded by 17-year-old Lukas Pohland, who experienced cyberbullying himself. In addition to detailed information on the topic, the platform offers online counseling for young people by young people who have been specially trained for this purpose.

What else can parents do?

It is important that your child also knows what to do if they are being bullied online. It is best to find out more about the topic together with your child.

For example, watch together the web series Wake Up! and talk about it with your child afterwards. In six short videos, two young people explain the topic of “safety on social media” for young people. The videos also show how a friend can help an affected person. In addition, Wake Up! provides supportive information on how to prevent cyberbullying.

If online services are not enough support, school social workers or family counseling centers can help. What you can also do against cyberbullying, they learn here. The article also contains information on other offers, such as juuuport .

Cyberbullying

Almost everyone knows the term. This refers to insulting, exposing or threatening people via the Internet and smartphone, e.g. via apps such as Snapchat, WhatsApp or Instagram. But not every message or post on a social media profile with the content “Martin is dumb!” endangers your child’s development.

Bullying takes place everywhere

Bullying has not just existed since social media came into existence. But since almost everyone has a smartphone these days, it doesn’t stop for them when they get out of school in the afternoon. Children and young people are in quasi constant contact with each other, e.g. via class chat on WhatsApp.

Bullying is mostly cyberbullying at the same time, because some people dare to spread mean thing about others and insult them more via cell phone. Sometimes disputes or bullying start in class or in the schoolyard and get worse via communication on the net.

What is cyberbullying?

  • Bullying takes place via digital media and social media platforms.
  • Most often, the intention is to deliberately harm a person. With cyberbullying, the “bullies” may not even realize they have gone too far. What was meant as fun can have negative consequences.
  • Since content can be stored and shared unnoticed, a single publication is enough to cause long-term damage.
  • It is not always clear who is behind it, because you can also post insults anonymously.
  • It’s much easier to insult someone with a smartphone message than to say an insult directly to their face and get the reaction.

What you can do against bullying?

There are people who behave less socially on the Internet than usual. If you show your child that rules of friendly interaction also apply online, hopefully others will behave in the same way. You can talk to other parents about making certain rules apply to everyone.

When children and young people communicate with each other, there are always times when insults are used. This does not have to be bullying, but is often just a joke. They use it to test how far they can go. However, this limit is different for each child.

Regularly ask what your child is doing online, talk to him about possible risks. Be responsive when it encounters problems. Show him ways to block individual users in the apps. On portals like juuuport, your child can get in touch with peers if he or she is afraid to tell you about problems online.

If you notice that your child withdraws and no longer meets friends, you should carefully ask what is behind it. If you are concerned about being bullied, you can contact the classroom teacher. If it really is bullying, be sure to preserve the evidence on your child’s phone, such as screenshots. Certain behaviors associated with bullying – such as threatening, defaming, and disseminating photos of others – are even punishable by law.

In case of massive threats, you should definitely go to the police. You should also report bullying incidents on the platforms where they occurred.

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Cybergrooming – when strangers seek contact with children over the net

Clearly, you know your child’s friends from school or the sports club. But what about acquaintances with whom your child has contact only via the Internet? Wherever children and young people communicate with each other, they can come into contact with people who have negative intentions.

What is cybergrooming?

Portals like Instagram or TikTok, where children and young people like to hang out, also attract users with pedo-criminal tendencies. This is criminal behavior directed at children and is of great concern to many parents. Adults or perpetrators may approach children with the goal of sexually harassing or even abusing them. This targeted approach on the net is called cybergrooming.

The perpetrators take different approaches: They ask very specifically about the child’s or adolescent’s sexual experiences or they publicly describe their sexual preferences. Some gradually worm their way into the child’s trust by pretending to be a peer or taking on the role of a talent scout. Subsequently, the exchange of messages can shift to private spaces, e.g., via individual messages on WhatsApp. This is especially problematic because others cannot see this private chat. There, the perpetrators try to build trust, which is later exploited, for example by asking for nude pictures of the child. With this, the child can be blackmailed later. There is a threat to publish the pictures if more photos are not sent. Or the person may even try to date the child or youth in person.

How do I protect my child from cybergrooming?

  • Take the first steps in social networks together with your child. In this way, your child will learn about the different functions and rules of behavior.
  • In order for your child to know about the dangers at an early age and be able to recognize them in time, talk about them in a very open and factual manner. If your child knows he or she can talk to you about such issues, he or she is likely to turn to you when encountering problems online.
  • Make it clear to your child: the Internet is a public space, but you can’t always tell who you’re dealing with. Therefore, a healthy distrust is absolutely necessary. Contact requests from strangers should not be confirmed. Unknown users can also be blocked or reported.
  • Private information such as full name, date of birth, address or even private pictures should never be made public by your child or entrusted to unknown persons. What is once on the Internet or sent, can never be deleted or only with great difficulty!
  • Together and regularly with your child, go over the privacy settings of the platforms and apps you use and talk about them.
  • Make it clear to your child that he can trust his gut. If chat content or prompts seem strange or frightening to your child, he or she should stop contact and contact you or another adult.
  • When young people are active on flirting and dating apps, special caution against sexual harassment applies, since moderation by the provider and sufficient security settings do not exist everywhere. It is especially important to disable the tracking function so that your child cannot be tracked.
  • Children and young people are particularly curious. Therefore, they sometimes forget all warnings and can fall into a trap. Be sure to make it clear to your child that even in such cases, the blame lies solely with the offender.
  • If your child is sexually harassed, be there for your child and do not blame him or her. Report the perpetrator on the respective platform, secure evidence, e.g. by screenshots, and be sure to file a complaint with the police!

Help, advice and information can also be found here:

For children and teenagers at…

For parents at…

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