The smartphone vibrates in your pocket. When you look at it, there are 15 new messages in the family group and a voice message from your best friend waiting for your reply. This can be annoying or even put pressure on you. Being constantly connected and reachable can trigger digital stress – even among young people. But how does that happen?
Digital stress is primarily linked to constant availability, distractions, and the feeling that one must always be reachable and respond. Most teenagers—and many adults as well—assume that they must reply to or respond to messages on WhatsApp, Instagram, and similar platforms within a few minutes. This expectation of always having to be available can lead to stress on both sides, for example, when other important tasks—such as homework—are neglected as a result.
Many teenagers take their smartphones to bed with them. First thing in the morning after waking up, many teenagers automatically reach for their smartphones. This also happens at other times of the day, often completely unconsciously as a distraction or out of boredom. For many, for example, scrolling through their social media feed before falling asleep serves as a bedtime story. In particular, using devices right before bed and receiving nighttime notifications can make it harder for children and teens to wind down and can lead to poorer sleep quality.
For children and teens, it’s a normal part of life to constantly interact with friends via messaging apps, social media, or online games and to stay in touch. But this also comes with social pressure. Social media apps are designed to capture as much of users’ attention as possible, and not all of the content is good for young people. Presenting oneself in a certain light and comparing oneself to idols or friends can be exhausting. Online games also use reward systems and performance-based mechanics to keep players engaged.
For example, those who don’t participate in group chats fear being excluded in the schoolyard as well. That’s why it’s especially hard for younger teens to escape the flood of messages. Many teens are afraid of missing out on something. This feeling is often referred to as FOMO (“Fear of Missing Out”).
At the same time, many teens are annoyed that their friends are constantly looking at their phones when they’re out together. On the other hand, they themselves find it hard to take their eyes off their phones and are constantly checking them for new messages. When a red number appears next to an app icon on the screen, it makes them excited and curious. It’s a little rush of happiness that they want to experience as often as possible.
Older teens are often already aware of the problem and try to find their own solutions to it. They’re better able to set boundaries with their circle of friends and confidently pursue their own needs. Some teens are now consciously trying to turn off notifications or take regular breaks from their smartphones. The idea behind this is to avoid feeling like they have to keep up with everything all the time and to find more peace and quiet.
In the age of smartphones, mobile internet, and messaging apps, almost everyone is probably familiar with the term “digital stress.” Many children and teens are bothered by the fact that their parents, too, are on their smartphones too often. You serve as a role model for your child when it comes to mindful media use. If you feel stressed by your own smartphone use, talk openly with your child about it. This will help them feel understood when they can’t put their smartphone down.
Together with the whole family, find strategies to reduce stress. Set rules together to reduce time on the cell phone. This can be, for example, a ban on cell phones during meals together or in the bedroom. Of course, the adults must also abide by these rules!
Or you could agree on a “digital detox”: Work together to set specific offline times when everyone puts their smartphones aside, stops scrolling, and doesn’t respond to chats—for example, at the dinner table or during an outing. During this time, you can consciously do other things that are good for you, such as exercising, playing games, listening to music, reading aloud, or simply talking together. This provides a break without completely banning digital media.
Even short periods of time spent offline can help you become more aware of your digital habits. Use these moments to talk with your child about when using a smartphone is beneficial and when it tends to cause stress. Apps for managing screen time or settings like ” Screen Time ” can help you use media more mindfully.
