Replying to a message, scrolling through social media or looking something up – for many parents, the smartphone is a natural part of everyday life. At the same time, many ask themselves: Is my baby getting too little attention as a result? The important thing to remember is that it’s not about perfection, but about conscious use.
In the first few months of life, your baby learns primarily through interaction with you. Eye contact, voice, facial expressions and your reactions help him to understand the world and feel safe. When you respond to your baby’s signals, it experiences: “I am seen and understood.” This happens in many small everyday moments when feeding, changing, carrying or playing. Babies do not need constant entertainment. Short moments of shared attention are often enough.
If you frequently look at your smartphone, shared moments can be interrupted:
This usually happens unconsciously. Babies cannot yet understand why the shared moment suddenly ends. When adults look at their smartphones, their facial expressions and reactions are often less attentive and attuned. Frequent interruptions can unsettle babies, especially if they occur regularly.
The smartphone does not have to disappear completely from everyday family life. Short periods of cell phone use are normal and generally unproblematic. Especially with a baby, many parents use their smartphone to keep in touch with other adults, search for information or switch off briefly. Stressful days, distractions and interruptions are also part of everyday life with children. Parents don’t have to be constantly available or attentive. It is crucial that there are always conscious moments of closeness and attention.
Even babies experience the place that smartphones and other media play in everyday family life. When screens are constantly present, this quickly becomes the norm. This makes it all the more important to consciously organize times together without media.
If you notice that your smartphone often distracts you or that you feel less connected in everyday life, small changes can help. Fixed moments without a smartphone are often enough to experience time together more consciously.
Can’t find an answer to your question? Ask your personal questions about your child’s media use directly and conveniently using the messenger service via WhatsApp or Threema. You can find more information here.
Violent videos, inappropriate content or advertising: many parents worry about what their child could come into contact with in digital media. This often results in the desire to keep children away from smartphones, tablets or televisions for as long as possible. However, as digital media is present in many areas of life today, contact with it can hardly be avoided.
Many parents want their children to grow up without digital media for as long as possible. This is often based on the desire for a carefree childhood with lots of exercise, free play and direct contact with other people.
The development of basic skills is particularly important for young children: learning to speak, discovering the world around them, building relationships and gaining their own experiences. Some parents therefore fear that digital media could take up too much space in everyday life too early. Concerns about unsuitable content, advertising or excessive screen time also play a role.
Children experience at an early age that smartphones, tablets and televisions are taken for granted by adults. They see how messages are read, videos are watched and photos are sent. Children also encounter media outside the family with friends, relatives or later at nursery and school. By primary school age at the latest, digital media becomes a part of everyday life for many children. Children are curious and want to understand what is happening on screens. Especially when media is so present in their environment.
When parents try to ban media completely, it is precisely this ban that makes media particularly appealing to children. Furthermore, children only learn how to use media safely if they can gain experience. This is because media literacy does not come automatically, it develops step by step. Children have to learn to understand content, ask questions and categorize experiences. Discussions with parents play an important role in this. This is why many media education concepts do not aim to shield children completely, but to accompany them during their first media experiences.
For younger children in particular, it makes sense to use media together at first. Parents can select suitable content and explain what is happening on the screen. This creates shared media experiences that can be categorized and discussed.
This allows children to learn about media in a protected environment. Questions can be clarified directly and parents can react if children do not understand something or are frightened by content. It is not about trying out as many media offerings as possible. A small amount of age-appropriate content that is of interest to children and that they can understand is often sufficient. At the same time, other activities remain central: play, exercise, creative activities and conversations with family and friends. In addition to videos or games, children can also use media creatively, for example by taking photos or recording short stories.
Today, media is part of everyday life for many families. At the same time, this does not mean that it has to play a major role in family life.
For many families, a simple orientation helps:
In this way, children learn step by step to understand and use digital media responsibly.
A smartphone offers many possibilities: chatting, playing games, watching videos. Using it needs to be learned. The decisive factor is not the age of your child, but what they can already do and understand. This checklist will help you to assess this more accurately. Your child does not have to fulfill all the points. The more that apply, the better prepared your child will be. The checklist serves as a guide and does not replace an individual decision.
… has gained initial experience in using a smartphone
… masters basic functions and settings
… has basic knowledge of costs and advertising
… consciously selects apps and content
… consciously handles personal data and privacy
… behaves respectfully online
… recognizes risks and can deal with them
… observes rules
… can assess their own usage behavior
Go through the points together with your child. This will help you recognize what is already working well and where your child still needs support. If many of the points apply, a smartphone of their own can be a sensible next step, with clear rules and support. If many points do not yet apply, your child should continue to practise these skills, for example on your smartphone first.
Even if your child is well prepared, support remains important:
Having your own smartphone is not a one-off step, but a learning process that you shape together.
The social media platform Instagram is very popular with children and young people. This raises the question of how young users can be well supported and protected on the social network. Instagram therefore offers various settings for young people to enable greater safety. We present the most important functions.
On social networks such as Instagram, young people can come across inappropriate content such as erotic images, dangerous challenges, disinformation, extremist content or advertising. Dealing with issues such as cyberbullying, problematic contacts or the unwanted dissemination of their own data and posts can be challenging. Because young people are often still learning how to deal with such risks, they need special protection. This is why platforms have been legally obliged to provide protective measures for minors as well as guidance and settings options for parents since the amendment of the Youth Protection Act.
For young people aged 13 to 17, a teen account is created by default when they register with Instagram. Such an account is characterized by the following points, among others:
About the parental supervision parents can link their children’s accounts with their own and monitor and restrict their use, e.g. set time limits or make security settings. Parents are informed about their children’s activities here – for example, how long they have been active on the network, what contacts have taken place or whether content has been reported or blocked. If you do not use parental control, If young people between the ages of 13 and 15 use Instagram without parental control, the strictest security settings automatically apply to their teen account. Young people aged 16 and over can relax the security settings of their teen account themselves without parental supervision.
The settings in the teen accounts relate exclusively to how the account itself is set up on the platform. In addition, there are general security measures that you should implement together with your child:
You can find a step-by-step guide to parental controls on Instagram at medien-kindersicher.de. Instagram offers a guide for parents with conversation starters and a glossary of important terms.
Safety settings, teen account and parental supervision create an important basis for more protection on Instagram. The following points are also important to help your child use Instagram safely:
Instagram offers families support with safe use. However, it remains crucial that you talk to your child regularly about safety, well-being and potential risks on social media and that you are available to answer questions and problems. This will help your child develop confidence and skills in dealing with media.
Instagram remains one of the most popular social media platforms, especially among young people. The app makes it possible to share photos and videos, create stories and interact with friends and influencers.
Instagram, or Insta for short, is one of the largest social networks alongside Facebook and TikTok. It offers users the opportunity to create their own profile and connect with each other.
Images and videos can be shared via the profile. Users can either publish content as permanent posts or post it as a story or live video. Stories and live streams disappear after 24 hours, but can be saved as a highlight. The photos and videos of subscribed channels and people are displayed in the feed.
Users can find a wide variety of content on Insta: Postings from stars, brands and challenges through to personal profiles of friends. They can respond with likes and comments, save content and chat with each other via direct messages (“DMs”). Profiles and posts can contain links that lead to other websites.
Users can create and edit their own posts with filters, emojis and fonts directly in the app. Content is sorted by topic using hashtags. Reels (short TikTok-style videos) can be accessed via the video icon.
At the end of 2023, Meta also launched the Threads social media app in Germany. This is linked to Instagram.
Since around 2025, Instagram has increasingly relied on AI services, offering image editing, for example, but also text creation for posts and hashtags via AI. Connecting with each other is also becoming even more possible via “friends tabs” and location functions.
Young people up to the age of 18 automatically have so-called teen accounts with additional protective functions such as restricted contact options and stricter content filters. The accounts are set to private by default and have an integrated time limit – after 60 minutes of use, young people are asked to exit the app. From the age of 16, young people can relax the restrictions themselves. The “Parental control” function allows parents to monitor and restrict their child’s use. Activation must be approved by the parent and the young person.
Data protection: Instagram should be treated with caution when it comes to data protection for several reasons.
Costs: Instagram is basically free of charge. However, many profiles advertise products that can be purchased with just a few clicks. Ads with corresponding links also frequently appear in the feeds and are difficult to distinguish from real content. Creators and influencers can also offer exclusive content that can be accessed via a paid subscription. Meta has also been offering a subscription model for Facebook and Instagram since 2024: For at least €5.99 per month, the provider promises not to show any personalized advertising. Of course, general advertising is still available – and Meta also continues to collect data.
Inappropriate content: Certain content can be problematic for young people, such as erotic images, dangerous challenges, disinformation or advertising. Influencer business models play a special role here, which young people do not always recognize. Content created using artificial intelligence in particular can contain very problematic content and is difficult for young people to distinguish from real content. This applies to deepnudes or deepfakes, for example, but also to political campaigns.
Communication risks: Functions such as chats and comments harbor communication risks such as being contacted by strangers, hate speech or cyberbullying.
Artificial intelligence: AI is also becoming an increasingly important topic in social networks. It plays a role in several areas:
Despite the official minimum age of 13, there is no effective age check. There are extensive usage and settings options for minors and their parents. You can read a short version of the terms of use at Handysektor and download a flyer with the most important safety information about Instagram for young people from klicksafe.
Parents can link their account with that of their child in the parental control. All setting options can be found on the medien-kindersicher.de website. You can find out how Instagram wants to make the app safer for young people directly on the Instagram website.
Consider together with your child at what age and according to what rules they are allowed to use Instagram. Check the app settings together so that your child can use Instagram as safely as possible. Not all photos must or may be shared with everyone or only with friends. In addition to your own boundaries, it is also important that your child knows and respects the copyrights and personal rights of others.
Talk to your child about communication risks. Show your child how they can block or report other users and explain to them when these functions are useful – for example, if someone insults your child in the comments. Your child should not accept requests from strangers and should use their own data, such as their location , sparingly.
Educate your child about risks such as harmful content, hate speech, disinformation and political opinion making. Also talk about critical behavior of influencers and stay in conversation with your child about one-sided role models and clichés. Stay interested and regularly ask who your child follows on Instagram and who follows them. It is important that your child knows that they can always talk to you if they have an unpleasant experience on the platform.
Children and young people are online every day – in class chats, playing games or on social media. They need guidance and support in their everyday lives so that they can navigate safely. Laws such as the General Data Protection Regulation or youth media protection regulations create important framework conditions. However, it is also crucial that children learn to use media safely and consciously. You will find many articles on our website to help you with this.
How much media time makes sense? What rules help in everyday life? And when does it make sense to have your own smartphone?
You can make clear agreements together and gradually give your child more responsibility. Your own behavior is also important here: Children are strongly influenced by how adults use media. Therefore, use media together as much as possible: watch content together, play games together or talk about it.
Personal data is quickly visible online. Many apps automatically collect information, even from children. This makes it all the more important to check the privacy settings together and handle data consciously. In the articles, you will find out which settings are important, where typical risks lie and how you can help your child to protect their data.
Children and young people can be confronted with stressful situations online, such as insults, false information or unwanted contact. The articles show how you can strengthen your child, recognize signals and react correctly in an emergency. Above all, it is important that your child knows that they can turn to you at any time.
Not all online content is suitable for children, especially on video platforms and social networks. Age ratings and technical protection measures can help, but are no substitute for guidance in everyday life. The articles will help you to better assess content and find a suitable approach together with your child.
A large proportion of media use takes place via messengers, social networks and online games. This can quickly lead to misunderstandings, conflicts or unpleasant situations. The articles show how communication works online and how you can help your child to act respectfully and safely.
AI chatbots, personalized content and new platform functions are now part of everyday life for many children and young people. The articles explain how AI works, where the opportunities lie and which risks you should keep an eye on.
This selection is an introduction. You can find many more articles on apps, games, social media and current trends on our website.
A commercial before a video, a bonus for watching an ad in the middle of a game or an interruption while streaming: advertising is part of everyday life for children and young people today. It is omnipresent and often integrated in such a way that it is barely noticeable.
Advertising on the Internet has been around for a long time. What has changed significantly is how it is integrated today. It no longer just appears alongside content, but directly within it. Children encounter advertising on different platforms at the same time, for example when watching videos, in apps, in games or on streaming services. Many services are free or cheaper because they are financed by advertising. Others offer paid, ad-free versions.
Important: This is about advertising that is displayed directly by platforms, apps or games themselves, not about advertising by influencers where people present products.
Videos on the Internet without advertising have become rare. Commercials run before and during videos, often several in a row or without a skip function. On platforms such as YouTube, these ads can appear several times in succession. There are also overlays in the image and references to paid, ad-free subscriptions.
It is often not clear to children where the actual content begins and where advertising ends. Advertising is often designed in a similar way to videos themselves, fast, colorful and entertaining. Many ads are personalized. They are based on what content has been viewed so far or what users are interested in. The basis for this includes cookies and user profiles that evaluate behavior.
Although special rules apply to content aimed at children, advertising is still displayed. Specially adapted content can therefore be useful for younger children.
Streaming services are also increasingly relying on advertising and, in addition to traditional subscriptions without advertising, are increasingly offering cheaper models with commercial breaks. These appear before or during a movie or series and are reminiscent of television. Here too, advertising can be personalized and based on previous usage data.
Advertising is particularly present in games and free apps. Here, it is often directly linked to usage: Anyone who watches an advertising video receives rewards such as coins, additional lives or new functions. This changes perception. Advertising is not only viewed, but actively used to progress in the game.
In addition, banners, pop-ups or notices about purchases appear within the app. These are often directly linked to the course of the game and can lead to quick spending. Children also encounter advertising in the browser, i.e. on websites, for example in the form of banners, pop-ups or videos that start automatically. These can appear while surfing and are not always easy to close or skip.
Ads also regularly appear in feeds and story areas on platforms such as Instagram and TikTok. They often resemble normal posts, but come from accounts that you do not follow. They are often labeled with terms such as “Sponsored”, for example in the feed or between short videos. These notices are easy to miss, especially for children.
In addition, trends, hashtags and challenges are specifically used by companies to generate attention for products.
Children first have to learn to understand and categorize advertising. Digital advertising makes this even more difficult because it is adapted to media in terms of appearance and content, is very short and entertaining and is integrated directly into games, videos or feeds. There is often no clear distinction between content and advertising. Younger children in particular are therefore often unaware of advertising.
Advertising content is constantly present and often not clearly labeled. Content is interrupted or mixed with commercial elements. Reward systems can lead to children making targeted use of advertising without questioning its purpose. At the same time, direct links quickly lead to purchases within apps or games.
Then there is the use of data: many advertisements are based on information collected about the behavior of users. Not all content is age-appropriate, even if there are corresponding guidelines.
Accompany your child, especially during their first steps in digital media. Explain in concrete terms what advertising is, why it is displayed and how it can be recognized. Use examples from your child’s everyday life, for example when playing games or watching videos.
Talk about the fact that many offers have to earn money, either through advertising or subscriptions.
Check settings together and restrict personalized advertising (if possible), deactivate or protect in-app purchases and use age-appropriate profiles or offers. In most services, advertising cannot be switched off completely, often only individual preferences can be adjusted.
Technical measures can provide support, but are no substitute for guidance.
A cute photo of the family party in the WhatsApp status or on platforms such as Instagram is a matter of course for many. For parents, it can be uncomfortable when pictures of their own child are shared without consultation. This is not about forbidding others to do something, but about protecting your own child’s privacy.
Photos of children are personal data. Once shared online, they are almost impossible to control or delete completely. Images can be saved, distributed via screenshots or simply forwarded. You often don’t realize this. The more people can see a photo, for example via status functions or public profiles, the greater the risk of it being passed on. Children’s pictures can be misused or forwarded.
Children have a right to privacy and to have a say in what is shown of them. They also have a right to their own image, which is why photos should not be shared without consent. At the same time, they are often not yet able to assess the consequences. Every time a photo is shared, a digital image of your child is created that they can no longer control themselves. It becomes particularly sensitive when photos are published together with names, place of residence or other personal information. If other children can be seen in the photo, parental consent should also be obtained. Many relatives or acquaintances mean well. They want to share beautiful moments or express their joy. This is precisely why respectful treatment is important.
Many conflicts can be avoided if expectations are clarified at an early stage:
It is important that your attitude is understandable, without accusations.
Some react with surprise or feel criticized. It helps to calmly explain why the topic is important to you:
A change of perspective can help. Would you want such photos of yourself to be seen on the Internet?
Despite agreements, it can happen that photos are shared. It then makes sense to react promptly:
In many cases, the problem can be resolved in a personal conversation.
The older children get, the more important their own opinion is. Ask your child whether they agree with a photo. From primary school age, many children are already able to decide whether a picture of them can be shared. This teaches your child to think about their own privacy and set boundaries.
Also pay attention to your own behavior. Ask your child and other parents before you share photos. This will show you what respectful behavior can look like.
If agreements are repeatedly ignored or conflicts arise, remain calm and clear in your stance. Raise the issue again and look for solutions together. In some cases, it makes sense to bring in outside support to clarify the situation.
Can’t find an answer to your question? Ask your personal questions about your child’s media use directly and conveniently using the messenger service via WhatsApp or Threema. You can find more information here.
“A real man doesn’t show any feelings” or “Women only want successful men” – when scrolling through TikTok, YouTube or Instagram, young people come across many ideas about how men or women are supposed to be. Some videos look like harmless dating tips, fitness motivation or lifestyle content. However, they may be based on extreme or oversimplified role models.
A lot of content about relationships, dating or “real masculinity” is circulating on social media. Some creators convey clear rules about how men or women should supposedly be or behave. These are often about success, dominance, attractiveness or traditional roles in relationships. Some of these role models are also used by extremist groups to appeal to young people online.
The term “manosphere” keeps cropping up in this context. This refers to a loose network of online communities that deal with masculinity, relationships and gender roles. The content can be found on platforms such as TikTok, YouTube, Instagram, Reddit or in podcasts.
Many posts initially seem like advice for young men: they should become more self-confident and muscular, earn more money or be more successful in dating. In some communities, however, oversimplified or misogynistic ideas are spread. For example, it is claimed that men are disadvantaged by equality or that they have to be dominant in relationships.
In addition to content like this, there are also trends that show very traditional female roles. In the so-called tradwife trend, influencers present a life as a “traditional wife” who mainly takes care of the household, family and her partner. The videos often appear aesthetic and deliberately staged.
Much of this content is not overtly extremist. Problematic messages about gender roles are often conveyed indirectly or linked to humor, lifestyle or motivation.
Young people deal intensively with questions about identity, relationships and their place in the world. Content about role models can therefore have a major impact.
Some aspects may appeal particularly to young people:
The Tradwife trend can also appeal to young people because it shows a seemingly harmonious life model. Conflicts or inequalities usually remain invisible in such videos. In addition, social platforms often suggest other similar content. This can give the impression that many people think this way.
Some of these videos or posts may contain problematic messages or reinforce extreme role models.
Social network algorithms can also contribute to young people seeing similar content more and more frequently, resulting in a one-sided view of the world.
Young people often come across such content by chance. This makes it all the more important to monitor their media use.
An open conversation about relationships, equality and what young people see on social media can help to critically classify extreme messages.
Events such as wars, natural disasters or political conflicts often dominate news coverage for days on end. Children hear about these topics – through conversations at home, at school or on the internet. However, much of the information is difficult to understand or frightening. How can children be introduced to news in an age-appropriate way?
Children should learn to understand the world. However, many news formats for adults are too complex or show images of violence or disasters that can overwhelm children. What’s more, false reports and highly simplified or distorted representations spread quickly on the internet. Information can be shared via social media or messengers in particular without being classified. It is often difficult for children to recognize whether a message is really true.
Age-appropriate guidance is therefore important. Parents can help to classify what they have seen – and select suitable, safe offers.
When it comes to stressful topics such as war or armed conflicts, children need special support and a good understanding from adults.
There are various news services on the Internet especially for children. They use simple language, clear explanations and do not use particularly distressing images.
Recommended offers:
The children’s search engine fragFINN.de helps to find trustworthy children’s offers on the Internet. The search results are editorially checked and filtered according to age.
Some children prefer listening to the news to watching it. Podcasts can be a good alternative. Especially when images of crises or disasters could be stressful.
Recommended podcasts:
Young people often find information via social networks. News appears there in the feed between entertainment videos, memes or posts by influencers. As a result, it is not always immediately clear whether information comes from a journalistic editorial team or is merely a personal opinion.
Reputable offers therefore try to reach young people directly on the platforms they use anyway.
Examples:
Even child-friendly news can be unsettling. Some children react curiously, others quickly become worried. It is not only the media on offer that is decisive, but also the guidance provided by adults.
News about war, violence and armed conflicts shake us all. What adults often find hard to comprehend is usually even harder for children to understand. Keeping children away from the latest news is almost impossible. This makes it all the more important to accompany children and give them security. We provide suggestions for dealing with stressful news and present media formats suitable for children on this topic.
Children often get more than adults think. It is therefore important to take their questions seriously and respond to their feelings. If children can talk about their worries, it helps them to process the experience better. Comfort your child and show them closeness, for example by giving them a hug – this provides security in difficult moments.
Younger children process things that occupy them in play or by drawing a picture. If your child doesn’t do it on their own, you can encourage them to do it and join in. Expressing yourself in pictures or text can also be a great way for older children and teens. But conversations and concrete information are also important for them. Show your child age-appropriate offerings and alert him or her to possible misinformation. Encourage your child to show you if they are sent scary pictures and videos via social media or Messenger and talk to them about it.
When children hear news about war, it can make them feel insecure. Younger children especially need the reassuring message that they are safe and that adults care about their protection. Explain to your child that the war is far away and that many people and organizations are working to create peace. Show your child that they are not completely helpless, but that there are ways to do something good. Think together about how you can help, for example by organizing a fundraising campaign or taking part in a peace project at school or in the neighbourhood. This will show your child that you don’t just have to be afraid in difficult situations, but that you can contribute something yourself.
Even as an adult, you have the right to be overwhelmed with the situation and the news. You do not have to be able to answer all the questions. Be honest with your child and show your ignorance or feelings in connection with the events in war zones. It is important that you do not avoid the topic.
In our article “News for children and young people” you will find tips on how to deal with news in general and links to age-appropriate offers.
We recommend the following formats for parents and children on the subject of armed conflicts and war:
Even if stressful news is unsettling, you can give your child security and guidance with attention, closeness, open conversations and access to age-appropriate news formats.
Sometimes you open an app and have the feeling that it knows more about you than you do. Algorithmic recommendation systems that sort, weight and prioritize content according to certain criteria are responsible for this. They determine which content is preferentially displayed to users, including children and young people. It is important for parents to understand how these systems work and what effects they can have.
Algorithms decide how content is displayed in the personal feed and also suggest further content in the search area, for example. In social networks, such areas have names such as “For You”, “Feed” or “Discover”. The principle is always the same: content is not displayed randomly, but selected individually. Such recommendation mechanisms are not only found in social networks, but also in streaming services, video portals and online stores. The basis for this is primarily usage data. This includes viewed content, likes, comments, length of stay, search queries, device information and, in some cases, location data.
Algorithms prefer to show content that matches previous interests or triggers particularly strong reactions, for example through surprise or provocation. Platforms want to display relevant content and keep users there for as long as possible. For children, this means that if they like something or stay with it for a long time, they will see more of it. Other topics fade into the background.
Instagram ‘s standard feed has been sorted algorithmically since 2016. A learning system evaluates various factors and decides which posts appear relevant. Among other things, previous interactions, the relationship to other accounts and the type of content are taken into account. Since 2022, users have been able to switch between a chronological view (“Follow me” or “Favorites”) and the standard algorithmic feed via the menu at the top of the app. “Follow me” shows posts from all subscribed accounts in chronological order, “Favorites” only shows selected accounts chronologically. The selection only applies to the current session and must be reactivated if required.
The system is constantly adapting. The more your child – or you yourself – interacts with certain content, the more it shapes the feed. This creates a very personalized stream of messages that often feels right for your child, but can also become one-sided.
Spotify also works with personalized recommendations. Spotify creates a taste profile based on listening behavior. Songs listened to, playlists, repetitions, times of day and duration of use are taken into account. On this basis, individual suggestions such as personalized mixes or weekly recommendations are created.
The system also compares listening habits with those of other users. Your child will be recommended music that matches similar profiles. This can open up new things, but also reinforces existing preferences.
TikTok places particular emphasis on viewing time and interactions. After just a short time, the system recognizes which videos your child watches longer or repeatedly. These signals have more influence than likes or the number of followers.
One effect of this is that content from unknown accounts can also very quickly gain a wide reach. At the same time, the video stream can narrow considerably if a topic is viewed particularly often. Sensitive or problematic content can also appear more frequently.
According to the Digital Services Act (DSA), very large platforms in the EU must explain more transparently how their recommendation systems work and, in some cases, offer non-personalized content display. These options are available, but are often not easy to find.
Your child should know that recommendations are technically controlled and not random. Discussions about algorithms help to better categorize content:
It is often difficult for children – and often for adults too – to understand why an app seems to understand them so well. This makes it all the more important to promote media literacy. This also includes talking about the fascination of social media and how technology draws attention. Trying things out together, such as resetting histories or adjusting settings, can lead to helpful “aha” moments.
Has your child been scrolling through YouTube shorts more often lately? These short videos are often very captivating and can lead to your child staying glued to the screen for longer.
YouTube Shorts is an area within YouTube with very short videos in portrait format. They work in a similar way to TikTok clips or Instagram reels. They include, for example, funny clips and challenges, life hacks and craft ideas, sports and gaming scenes as well as dance and music videos – often created by influencers. The clips are 15 to 60 seconds long and are played automatically one after the other. Which videos are shown is decided by a recommendation algorithm – a system that is based on previous user behavior.
Shorts are particularly appealing to children and teenagers because they:
But be careful: even if your child is not looking for it, surprisingly unsuitable content can appear in between because the selection is automatic.
With a swipe, the next video appears immediately – and your child can easily lose track of time. YouTube has therefore introduced a new function in Parental Controls:
You can find clear step-by-step instructions at medien-kindersicher.de under point 1.5.
By the way: The YouTube Kids app can be an option for younger children. It filters content according to age and encourages less endless scrolling.
Technical time limits and protection settings can help you with media education. They are only helpful if your child understands why these rules apply. Watching too many shorts can disrupt sleep, concentration and other activities such as hobbies or homework. If possible, set the media rules for usage times, times and breaks together, then your child will be more likely to stick to them.
Do you often spend a long time scrolling through short videos on Instagram, TikTok or YouTube? Then it may be that your child finds it harder to understand why you are stricter with them. We adults often spend a lot of time on our smartphones ourselves, e.g. to use messengers, read the news, listen to podcasts and organize our everyday lives. Try to reflect on your own media use and limit it if necessary, e.g. by introducing cell phone-free times or planning screen-free activities together.
Can’t find an answer to your question? Ask your personal questions about your child’s media use directly and conveniently using the messenger service via WhatsApp or Threema. You can find more information here.
It is actually forbidden – and yet it is surprisingly present: there is a drug scene on TikTok, in which some very young users are also active. Similar content can also be found on other social media platforms such as Facebook or in messengers such as WhatsApp and Telegram, but TikTok plays a particularly prominent role. This causes great concern among many parents, as such content can trivialize risks and convey misconceptions about drug use.
Illegal drugs find their way into the public domain via social media platforms such as TikTok. Under certain hashtags, there are videos of users talking about or hinting at their own drug use. These range from cannabis and mushrooms to MDMA, meth and heroin.
The substances are often not shown or named directly. Instead, the videos work with codes, slang terms, emojis or hints such as striking close-ups, over-excited behavior or extreme moods. In this way, the creators try to circumvent rules and still be understood.
Such content is prohibited under the German regulations for the protection of minors in the media as well as under the community rules of the platforms. TikTok prohibits the depiction, advertising, possession and trafficking of drugs. Nevertheless, such videos appear time and again. Some come from children and young people themselves, who receive likes or approving comments.
In recent months, terms such as “Pinktok” or “Pingtok” have also emerged. These terms are used to describe videos in which drug use is trivialized or only hinted at. In some cases, there are references to procurement or sale in the comments. In some cases, young people make further appointments there or then switch to private chats or messengers. In this way, not only are drugs discussed, but access to them can also be facilitated.
The problem with this drug scene, which is often just a click away, is that the videos appear colorful, relaxed and entertaining. Music, insider jokes and the feeling of belonging appeal to young people in particular. Risks, health consequences or addiction hardly play a role.
This can give children and young people the wrong impression. Drug use appears to be harmless recreational fun. Children and young people in particular who are looking for recognition, belonging or orientation or who feel lonely can feel attracted to such content. This is reinforced by recommendation algorithms. Anyone who watches such videos for a longer period of time is often shown similar content again. This can make the topic more and more present.
According to the community guidelines, drug-related content is not permitted – neither consumption, glorification nor sale. TikTok blocks known hashtags, deletes posts or restricts accounts if violations are detected or reported. The provider states that a lot of problematic content is detected automatically.
In practice, however, gaps remain. New terms, codes or trends are not always recognized immediately. Particularly suggestive or ironically staged content is difficult for automatic systems to classify.
In addition, legal requirements have been tightened, for example by adapting the regulations for the protection of minors in Germany. At European level, the Digital Services Act obliges large platforms to analyze risks for children and young people and take countermeasures. These measures improve structures, but do not guarantee complete protection of individual feeds.
A trusting relationship is crucial for both media and drug use. Stay in contact with your child and show an interest in their media use. Ideally, you will notice early on if your child encounters irritating content or has questions.
If your child is younger, technical protection measures can also help, such as TikTok’s accompanied mode or parental control functions on the device. However, technical protection does not replace a conversation, but supports it.
If you have the impression that your child is changing, seems mentally stressed or has already had contact with problematic content, the following steps can help:
A class photo is shared in a chat, a selfie ends up on social media. For many children, this is completely normal. And then suddenly a picture appears that never existed: a naked picture, but it has been technically manipulated. These are known as deep nudes. This can be extremely distressing for those affected. Many parents are unaware of this technology and only realize late on how quickly children can be affected by it.
Deepnudes are artificially generated nude images. They are created from real photos with the help of artificial intelligence. The AI analyzes existing images, digitally removes clothing and adds body parts to create a realistic impression. The image is completely invented.
The term originally comes from a specific program, but now stands for numerous AI-based applications that offer similar functions. Such services are often easily accessible, sometimes free of charge and can be used anonymously. It is particularly problematic that publicly accessible photos from social networks are sufficient for this purpose. Those affected often only find out about it when the image has already been distributed. By then, the damage is often already done.
Many children and young people grow up with AI applications as a matter of course. Filters, image editing and chatbots are part of their everyday lives. Tools for creating deepnudes are therefore sometimes perceived as a technical experiment without realizing the extent of the problem.
There are also developmental factors. Puberty is all about testing boundaries, belonging and making an impression. Some young people want to provoke, others adapt to peer pressure. They often lack an eye for the other side. That behind every picture is a real person with real feelings.
What’s more, deepnudes are not only created and distributed among young people. Third-party adults also use such AI tools to manipulate images of children, young people or adults. This poses an additional risk for those affected, as there is also a power imbalance, anonymity and possible criminal intent.
What begins as a joke or a test of courage can become very stressful for those affected.
Deep nudes are not a harmless trend. They are a form of digital, sexualized violence.
The feeling of powerlessness weighs particularly heavily. Many of those affected don’t know who they can turn to. Or don’t dare to say anything.
In Germany, the situation is clear: creating, possessing or distributing sexualized images of minors is punishable in the vast majority of cases. It does not matter whether the images are real or – as with deepnudes – artificially created. Personal rights, the right to one’s own image and data protection can also be violated, regardless of the age of the person depicted.
The consequences are difficult for children and young people to assess. What happens digitally sometimes feels less serious. This makes it all the more important for adults to provide guidance and clearly state responsibility.
Parents can’t prevent everything. But they can do a lot. Not through control, but through relationships.
Start the conversation early: Talk to your child about image manipulation, AI and deepnudes before anything happens. In an age-appropriate and calm manner. Explain that images can be altered online and why this is problematic.
Promote empathy: A change of perspective helps. Ask your child how they would feel if someone created or shared such a picture of them. This is often where understanding arises.
Take a clear stance: Make it clear that creating or forwarding such images is not fun, but a violation of boundaries. At the same time, children should know that mistakes are not met with anger, but with support.
Assure them of your support: Your child should be sure that they can turn to you at any time. Even if they are ashamed or unsure.
Act in an emergency: If your child is affected, stay calm and take it seriously. Save evidence such as screenshots or chat histories and report it to the police. But be careful with sexualized images of children and young people: It is a criminal offense to possess these. The Internet Complaints Office has summarized information on how to deal with these so-called depictions of abuse online in this PDF. Support is available from advice and reporting centers such as the Sexual Abuse Helpline and the Nummer gegen Kummer.
